The Ex Factor

The other night I awoke from an incredibly vivid dream where I drove across the country to my ex (and first love's) house, professed my undying love in a very Julia Roberts film kind of way, he called off his engagement, and we went off skydiving to celebrate and live happily ever after.


As I lay in the dark, in a sleepy haze, I thought, "Yes. That makes perfect sense. I'll go tomorrow."


Luckily, come morning, my senses had returned and I realized that it would be insane to ever act on such a dream, especially when we broke up close to seven years ago. So what was my problem then? How was my ex still sneaking his way into my dreams nearly a decade after we split?


I decided that the dreaded "ex factor" means that the first true love you have, will never really leave you. It will always hold a very special piece of your heart. There is something so pure and honest and completely unjaded about the first time you allow yourself to fall for someone... it can never really be duplicated. Sure, you can love again, but it's a different kind of love.


As I thought about my wild dream, I realized that my ex's recent engagement clearly rattled me more than I gave it credit for. But, instead of driving to him in a Hollywood fashion, I took off to my cottage for some quality reflection time. During the car ride I realized that I didn't really want my ex back - rather I wanted the idea of what our relationship represented.


And then, I had a horrible realization. If I died tomorrow, my ex would go down as my one great love thus far. But I am no longer his great love... he has found something greater than what we shared. As I processed this depressing thought, Adele's "Someone Like You" came onto the radio (I kid you not... God sure has a funny sense of humour). I began ugly crying while crooning along to Adele's lonely lyrics. [Warning: I do not suggest doing this while driving. I almost ran over an unsuspecting rabbit]


Anyway, post-blubber session, I remembered the gazillion reasons why my ex and I split and I felt much better knowing that I did not have to spend a lifetime dealing with our problems.


The dreaded ex factor is fun for no one- but I have decided to leave the dramatic cross-country pursuit and love confession to the romantic comedies for the time being. Something tells me that there would be no happy ending for this love story.


Attached: an amazing Saturday Night Live skit on the power of Adele's melancholy melody:


http://perezhilton.com/tv/SNL_Emma_Stone_Plays_With_Adeles_Someone_Like_You_/?id=3237b7dac57fc&autoplay=false